Situated dangerously close to the sewage works in the obscenely rich village of Prestbury lies Wallygrange Grammar School. An independent school which, unlike King’s School, can trace its roots back to the end of the Ice Age. Compared to us, King’s is a mere educational foetus waiting to emerge into the world and have its bottom smacked! Answer me this: can King’s School boast an in-house brewery run by the 6th Form? A brewery under the capable management of Ian Wheek, the son of Charles Wheek who produces Macclesfield’s famous Wheek Beer. But, instead of beer, our school’s 6th Form produce and bottle a non-alcoholic drink called Gooseberry Wine. Which has some very strange effects. The school, erroneously labelled by OFSTED as the worst in the world, is under the ample stewardship of the Headmaster, Alfred Scholar NUT TA. Without a trace of hyperbole this man lives in a mansion considerably larger than Wayne Rooney’s house.
