She's Having Her Baby

I briefly considered the wild hypocrisy involved in asking god to do anything for me after I had forsaken him my entire life

friendship with Nina was like a warm, familiar jumper I could slip on even years later and it would still fit, like I’d worn it just yesterday.

It was surreal to think that the bump in my belly held a little person who would be with me forever

The idea that my desire not to have children is some sort of dating tactic is ridiculous and really insensitive.

A baby that would grow and swell my belly and make me puke and sweat and possibly go a little nuts. God, the predictability of our biology was so depressing sometimes.

It was a huge, exhausting parallel universe I hadn’t even known existed, and I’d barely scratched the surface.

It was like when you hear a new band for the first time and then suddenly they’re everywhere and you wonder how you’d never heard them before, because now it seems like you’d never turned on the radio and not heard them.

suddenly chats with strangers about my uterus seemed like picnics in the park.

chosen and the thrill of seeing my team’s work on the newsstands, that familiar pride that felt like a hug and a high five all at once.

I thought of all the articles and headlines and cover lines I’d written, or helped craft, all the covers I’d